This person stole my dream blog name and then made it a blog about healthy shit.
FAIL.
Just when Courtney started to look a little normal in the face she went and got some ginormous titties that scare the shit of children and the elderly. And me. But probably not my boyfriend. Or any other dude that reads this shit.
I hope that's water in that glass you're holding, you've still got two more years before you can do that! And two more years before your husband goes on Medicare for that matter...
Here's an old retarded Courtney-face, which of course I love.
Miley, Miley, Miley...what the fuck is wrong with you these days?? I didn't judge you when I thought you were going off the deep end a la B-Spears, with that goofy-ass haircut you got. But now....ughh. I guess I somewhat understand, if I had broken off my engagement with Thor's smokin-hot baby brother I might do whatever it takes to get his attention again. But this shit...
...thanks, Miley...now we all need to go get our Hep B vaccinations. You see, people think that sticking out their tongues is sexy and cute but I'm here to tell you that unless you are under the age of six, IT IS NOT SEXY/HOT/CUTE or whatever the FUCK you think it is. You look like a fucking tool and EVERYONE is laughing at you. Or they think you're stroking. And yes, that's a mutherfucking GRILL you see in Miley's mouth.
Come on...what is this?? Stop it, Miley. You used to be such a cute and normal chick...
I mean, if I had a court date and wanted the judge to take me seriously I would probably roll out the gutter and into the courtroom stinking of booze and regret like Amanda, wouldn't you? Is she wearing a dead animal on her head and a sweatshirt?!
Oops, I forgot to add meth to the things she probably reeks of.
OH I almost forgot about Farrah and her new set of titties! Her surgeon must have been high because hers look terrible...they are too high on her chest and look like footballs. Then she goes and stuffs them into a bikini that is obviously for toddlers. Her face looks nice...but I will never be able to get the sight of her busted-volcano butthole out of my brain. EVER.
Now that I ripped on everyone else, lets be fair and share my very own hot-mess moment in time:
Sticker-attack courtesy of a 5 year old. The things we do for the rugrats we love.
I Googled "drunk alpacas" and this is what I got:
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