A Wedding Toast

Long story short, on my sister's wedding day my lovely brother Jason, a man of not so many words, got a hold of the DJ's microphone and proceeded to tell the story about how a 7 year-old sissy smeared poop in his 5 year-old face.  Only he was completely trashed at the time of the speech (as people sometimes get at weddings, especially those of your siblings; lets not judge) and luckily it was towards the end of the night when a majority of the guests had already departed for the evening.

"I want to give a little speech about my sister's childhood...I think you all have a misinterpretation about what kind of child she really was..."

This can't end well.

Sissy was going to the bathroom and brother was walking by and she said, hey come here!  So he poked his head in the bathroom and sissy took her poopy toilet paper and smeared it in his face.  He still hasn't gotten over it because he's still telling the story more than 20 years later, at her wedding.  Yeah, she was kind of of a demon-child.  Who does that?!  My sister.  Yep.

And then sissy lied to mom and dad and said that she actually never smeared the poop his face and he was forced to take the blame and say that he made up the whole story, even though she actually did it.

So when I said in my speech that I can't seem to recall a single story about sissy and I growing up because she spent the majority of her childhood terrorizing her siblings and I've blocked everything out, I wasn't the only one!  Brother was equally terrorized!

The video is hilarious. 

Thank GAWD brother and I don't have any embarrassing stories like this for him to tell at my wedding!  Except the few times I chased him around the house with a lighter because he was afraid of fire.  Such wonderful sisters he had! :)