Sh*t That I'm Thankful For

My family, my friends, my job, a roof over my head, clothes on my back, food in my belly, and my lovely boyfriend that puts up with my never ending array of bullshit....

Wine...because it's awesome!!!

Trader Joe's Three Buck Chuck for those weeks when I'm broke

Electric corkscrews, because I'm a lazy fucker.

Dry shampoo, so that I only have to get in the shower three times a week.

Facebook, so that I can distract myself from real life a million times a day.

Words with Friends, for keeping my mind sharp so that I don't get Alzheimer's someday.

Friends that live in warm climates so we have a free place to crash on vacation.  Wendy is the best hostess in all of Florida, BTW.

Headbands, because I'm a lazy fucker.

When you find that perfect e-card that you wish you could send to a certain someone...

My mom because she lets me bring all my wretched animals to her house and she loves them just as much as I do!

Fireball shots

Luke Bryan...no reason needed.

That one time I got up on the bar and took my shirt off and even though my friends took pictures they didn't show anyone!

Little kids and their honesty because lets face it...if anyone else were to tell you that you're fat they would get punched the fuck out.

When Ryan Gosling takes his shirt off

Pinterest and all of its wonderful food recipes that keep my chubby figure going strong

Taco Tuesday

WineWednesdayBitches

That one selfie that's about ten years old that I hang on to because it's my favorite even though I don't even look like that anymore

Snacks...specifically carbs.  All the carbs.

Yoga pants and maternity clothes even though I've never done yoga nor am I pregnant.

Swear words

COFFEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

24-hour fast food places so my drunk self can get my snack-attack on.

Key fob's, so that I can find my car in any parking lot

When your friends take pictures of you passed out and it's not a terrible picture that you would be embarrassed if your mom saw it:

Cake

Wine!  Did I mention wine?  It's worth mentioning again.

Saved By The Bell reruns!

Online shopping because the mall fucking sucks and I hate people.

Bobby Bones

And last but not least....ALPACAS!!!!

Have a safe and happy Thanksgiving!!!